Recently in solstice Category

Last week Teresa, a painter friend, said to me, "Your work seems very evolutionary." One experience leads to the next piece I told her. This morning some old friends stopped by to see the gallery and we talked of today being the solstice. She commented on the evolution of my pots and this project. I told her it took me a long time of living in the same house to understand how the sun moves seasonally. She looked at me and said, "Do you think that the Druids got Stonehenge right the first time?"  I'd never really contemplated the fact that the Druids refined a long series of stick or stones as precursors to Stonehenge.

At the end of my mother's life we planned to spend three weeks in Maine near my parents. I thought that every day I would take a walk with her and write about our conversations. It would be a twenty-one day project. When I got there and walked with Mom I realized her memory had really deteriorated and the old conversations about family dynamics, politics, and art were history. Instead, I found our walks and talks had to do with what was right in front of us. We looked at how the trees made crosses, the exotic colors of moss, and the bobbing boats. We picked wild flowers and put them in cups.  There was an intense appreciation of the moment. I remember thinking, it's not ever going to get any better than this.

On my five o'clock dog walk today I paused on the dock to watch the kingfishers swoop over the pond and make sudden splashes. The day seemed like it could go on forever. It was the polar opposite of my winter evening dog walks when I raced outside to see the last flare of  light. At either end of the spectrum I am driven to place some mark on paper, clay, or film.

 
21-leek.jpg Akiko Busch's mother died of a brain tumor and near the end of her life she lost the ability to assign words to thoughts.
"You could call this an episode of clarity. Certainly it was that to her, because for a moment a golden slip cover had restored all the precision and lucidity of language that were dear to her; on account of it she had recovered her voice. It was a moment of clarity for me as well, because I understood then that frivolity is not necessarily trite or foolish or petty; rather it is about the way essential information often comes to us, unpredictably, through play. I also understood that there are times when frivolity can intersect precisely and perfectly with a sense of of purpose. This can happen most effortlessly most gracefully when a sense of purpose elsewhere in your life seems either to be absent or irrelevant.
Since that time-- and probably in one way or another because of it-- I have made my work to write about design, about spoons and slipcovers, hats and houses. Sometimes the objects are called 'artifacts of the physical world.' I call them things, because so far as I understand it, design is about people and things. You could say that I write about design because I am fascinated by the relationships people forge with things and by the inevitability of how we engage in play with our material possessions. In my mother's case, she did it because the loss of speech made her relationships with other people unbearable. So she turned to the chaise and its golden slipcover, and for a moment on the telephone she was herself again."
The Uncommon Life of Common Objects, p. 155 
The apricot on my plate is not local, but it was so beautiful I couldn't resist the photograph. Zoe tells me that our blueberry bushes have spoiled her so she can't eat grocery store berries anymore. For dinner we picked broccoli from the garden; it is a much more intense green when cooked than any thing I ever buy from the grocery. An evening swim cooled our bodies and slowed us down so we could take the time to watch the clouds shape-shift and mark how far the sun has moved at sunset.

20-apricot.jpg"We live in a world which we are increasingly distanced from the natural rhythm of things. Our diet usually has little to do with what foods are in season; when days are short, we simply turn on the lights earlier; and while our travels may be inconvenienced by climate certainly they are not governed by it. I can't help but wonder, then if the appeal of swimming simply has to do with the reaffirmation of the body in a simple rhythm."   Nine Ways to Cross a River, Akiko Busch, page 52
Today went by in such a rush that I forgot to take a photo. (Today's image is from earlier in the month.) I had lots of visitors to the gallery, dinner on the porch and two birthday cakes! In the dusk we walked down to the pond feeling like it was truly a summer evening.  Zoe and I lay on the dock looking at the sky when a great blue heron flew over us barely ten feet away. Its slow flapping wings brought an index of memories of  summer evening to mind. Memories in full moon light or swimming in pitch black flashed before my eyes.The trees lit up with fireflies as if they were Christmas lights.  I have to breathe deep and remember it doesn't get much better than this.

19-honeysuckle.jpg "I think of that index of the unknown that we all carry with us. I haven't the faintest idea bout what kind of lives my sons will lead, though as with most parents, that often seems like the thing that matters most. Nor do I have any idea about how my own life will play out or where, though at fifty-two, that information suddenly seems more important to me than it has before. And I think of all the mysteries of intention and desire that keep us wondering about even those people we know best." Nine Ways to Cross a River, Akiko Busch, page 194

new pots, new backgrounds.

18-peas.jpgWe have been working hard getting ready for small contours.


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On mother's day I decided it was time to get my tomatoes in the ground. The first step however, was to pull up the towering forest of dill. I cut the dill into bunches, collected ten older vases and gave the bouquets to ten women as my random act of kindness. I always love the volunteer plants that come up by seed. I usually move them to garden beds so the paths stay clear. But by the end of the summer navigating my paths holds no straight lines and it more resembles following the ox bows of a lazy river. The dill forest has been restricted drastically, but it still towers in parts of the garden and it waved beautiful like a yellow flag in today's June breezes.

17-dill.jpg"It seems clear now, in that way that the unexpected can sometimes take hold of intent, thwarting and subverting it, that following the path of the river is as important as crossing it. A river can connect every bit as effectively as it divides."  Just Beneath the Surface, Akiko Busch

My mom always asked questions. As a teenager I thought they were dumb questions and the sound made me want to stick my head in my shirt as if I was a turtle and could retreat form the world. We would buy fruit and she would always ask where are these apples from or where were those strawberries grown, she would ask where the fish was caught. It was as if  by knowing how far her food had come she could vicariously travel as well. Now that there is a whole awareness of eating locally and knowing where your food comes from I realize my mom was way ahead of her times.


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Mom had a thing for sunsets she loved to see the sunset and she would rush dinner of delay it so that we could find a place to see the sunset. I remember one thanksgiving she visited us towards the end of her life and each evening we would go for a walk just before sunset and on the way back to the house the we were just below the crest of the hill and the geese flew into land on the pond and they were just above our heads. It was as if we could reach up and touch their webbed feet and the muscles of their flapping wings was overpowering. We both stopped and could not find words to describe the feeling. I turned to her and said I am so glad you experienced that that is one of the indescribable moments of living on this hilly terrain near a pond. It was the sound and feel of flapping. The strength of wings and the recognition of what energy it must take for those geese to fly. Tonight as we lingered after sunset it was fire flies and a crescent moon that kept us company.


"Akiko Busch, who was a visiting writer at Haystack during our second session, July 14-27,2009, writes about uncertainty and how it manifests itself in our art making, our lives, and in nature. While she touches on what is increasingly the spirit of our time, it's not a pessimist'sview. Not knowing exactly where we are going leaves us in a place of discovery. We are alive and embarking on a journey".-Stuart Kestenbaum

The shed that holds our gas kiln is a multi-use space. It's where we mix clay or set out the pots when stacking the kiln. In-between any task it becomes the spot where cardboard boxes and packing materials accumulate. Today was a day of shifting tides. The clay mixer got put away; the trough we use to mix the dry materials becomes a table.  The floor is swept, all surfaces cleared, and it feels like a low tide where a sandy beach has been exposed. Clean up is not a favorite part of the creative process but a productive one. I find tools that have been missing, test tiles from the last firing. My mother always used to send me postcards when she was cleaning. She would find images of pots she thought I'd like or quotes she found inspirational. The repetition of cleaning is part of an imprecise cycle. The tiles are gathered and put in a box out of sight with the knowledge that with time my perspective on their value will shift.
 
15-coneflower.jpg"Nor is the tide itself really much to count on. Repetition is rarely the exact science we imagine. The mathematics of the tide are imprecise, its rise and fall influenced by the angle of the sea bed, the depth of a channel or width of the bay at its mouth. It's good to be reminded of this--that every time we think we can measure the world, know its shape or how it moves, some new dimension is presented to us to throw our calculations off." The Ecology of Uncertainty, Akiko Busch

So much of what I do as a potter and a parent has to do with looking into the future. If I use a particular clay mixed with another slip combined with the heat of the kiln what will happen. If we make this choice then what? If I say that, what will the reaction be... If I plant this seed... I tell Zoe knowledge builds on experience and trying new things. When she was in middle school she would say but I don't know how to do such and such and I would remind her no one expects you to know how to do it, you just have to give it a try, we all have to start someplace. When I touch the blank page in a partially filled notebook I feel like I am touching the future. When I fill an unfired kiln it is a collaboration of art and science, of the known and unknown.


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"So much of what I do as a writer and as a parent has to do with understanding why things are as they are. Why was this building sited this way? Why does the page look the way it does? Why did you say that? And why did you stay up until two in the morning when you had an exam the following day? Why didn't you tell me how you felt? It is by necessity that I, along with most of us, expend time and energy on learning how things have come to be. Or not. Information is knowledge, I tell my sons. Lean whatever you can. Gather the facts. Find the reasons behind things, and then you will understand them. This is all important and true, I know, and yet Einstein said that the 'most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and science.' to find myself now at the edge of a river with unfathomable origins brought a certain thrill. I am happy to be reminded of the realm of the inexplicable."  Nine Ways to Cross a River (pp 183-84), Akiko Busch

13-leek.jpg"There is an argument to be made for doubt, for hesitation, for some practice of inquisition that cannot be answered instantaneously. Graciousness to the unknown is a keystone to Buddhist practice; implicit in the acceptance of the unknown is the ability to inhabit the present moment. Or being present for openness. In her meditation on the subject, Pema Chodron writes, 'We can bring ourselves back to the spiritual path countless times every day simply by exercising our willingness to rest in the uncertainty of the present moment--over and over again.' Which is also a way of saying that uncertainty doesn't belong to any particular precinct; it doesn't inhabit any established place in our lives, any single book, week, relationship, meal, trip, time, experience, thought, feeling. Rather, it is everywhere, like the fog, like the moss, like the current." The Ecology of Uncertainty, Akiko Busch
In choosing photos for the web I find that horizontal ones tend to work better because of the dimensions of screens. but every once in a while I can't resist a tall narrow photograph. It acts kind of like a waterfall for the viewing experience.

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'In graphic design, the word "river" refers to the white space between words that sometimes connects in a rippling vertical pattern down the printed page. Such a river is to be avoided because it can interrupt the flow of text in an irregular pattern and distract the reader's eye from the horizontal progression of the printed words. But just as it may be a distraction, that space between words also confirms their meaning. If a river can both separate and connect on the printed page, it is capable of doing this all the more in the natural world." Just beneath the surface Akiko Busch